Moving Forward

This weekend my niece got married. My oldest niece, born when I was in high school, is now married. She is the second of my brother's children to start their lives with their own family. Sweet, fuzzy headed baby Braelynn, who loved her hats and asking "why?" is married.




















It has been wonderful to watch her grow into this young lady full of poise and strength. She knows what she wants and has made it happen. Alex is wonderful and the two of them are going to go far.


 Spending the weekend at this glorious event gave me pause, though. It made me realize how far we have come in a year.

Just last year when Andrew married his love, Michelle, I was unable to really enjoy it. The hole in my heart was just too large, and I couldn't even fake it. I was so happy for them, but had so much trouble with my loss, I literally walked out on the Father/Daughter dance and sobbed by myself in the bathroom. I hope they didn't take my difficulty personally.

This was so different. While we all know Dad is gone, the wounds have scarred over. We are back to living again. We are able to enjoy life fully. We are able to acknowledge our missing piece, while simultaneously knowing how much he approves of our living.

While my children swam at the hotel before the festivities, I had the opportunity to sit with Mom. We got to talking about the last year and how so much good stuff has happened. We teared up thinking about just how proud Dad would have been to be at his oldest granddaughter's wedding. He was so proud of his family. He would have loved to hug her, share wisdom with her, and watch her happiness unfold.

He also would have been so proud of his son. Father of the bride, passing on his own wisdom after doing a job that Dad found most important--raising his family to be responsible, productive citizens. Dad would have been saying "I am so proud of you." He would have hugged him and shaken his hand, patted him on the back, with a huge smile and a "You done good."

There was a lot of smiling during the ceremony and after. There were tears, but all joyful. I could feel, as I always do, Dad's presence at this event. He is never far away. I miss his physical presence so much, but I am now able to take some comfort in those feelings of spiritual closeness that I get when I think of him. Watching our family live on in his absence makes me feel so proud of us. I know he is, too.

Congratulations, Braelynn and Alex! In the words of Grandad, "Now go and do great and wonderful things!!!"

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